Black Youth need Sex Education
The day that T.I stated that he checks his daughter hymen to see if her “virginity” was still in tact; should have been the day where Black youth were taught about sexual education, and not being humiliated for it. Even though the initial buzz of the conversation surrounding the statement and his later discussed apology is over, we still need to evaluate where he and we went wrong. Of course the discourse surrounding this comment was centered on the concept of boundaries and virginity. Which are both key components to what we really needed to discuss. We needed to discuss the prioritization of spreading knowledge of sexual health to Black youth under 20 in particular.
Black youth specifically are far more pushed back to believing that sexual health is a concept that will be experienced later in life rather than learned. We are taught that sexual health and reproductive health will hopefully be taught in our school systems. That someone else will explain and go through all the “uncomfortable” questions that would aspire. But as soon as youth decide to explore sexual relations, and as soon as these explorations go in an unexpected way, they are totally in control of education and how informed that they are.
In first and secondary schooling most youth were given a limited sexual health and reproductive education. This amount of education is not sufficient enough for youth. You can not expect them to learn all about the humxn body and our reactions to certain stimulations in an accelerated course. Even with that education they can go about a multitude of different strategies to uphold white cisheteronormative scare tactics that don’t allow for alternatives or disruption. This is not the way that black youth need to be taught about sex. We have already come to a consensus that education in general needs to be decolonized, but why not our perspective of sexual and reproductive health, and the teachings of it. This education shames and ignores the possibility of queerness, exploration, and non-monogamy. So how can we decolonize sex, especially when it comes to teaching it to youth.
You first need to ask the youth what they know about it. We don’t give young people enough credit for all the knowledge that they obtain. They have questions, they just need that language and affirming space to ask them. Once you have laid the groundwork for this, learn these concepts yourself! If you don’t know the answer, tell them that. Explore and learn with them. There is not just one way to sexual health, so why should there be one way to educate this. The access that black youth needs when it comes to sexual health is the same access they need to language. They need verbalized concepts and normalcy to the thoughts and feelings that they have.
Denying youth access to this means denying them the language and power they are entitled to when it comes to their own bodies and their experiences. Teaching youth about the simplest things such as consent can help improve their sense of self and their boundaries as well. Boundary setting is the most vital tool that youth can develop when going into adulthood and their own responsibilities as well.
As T.I displayed, the exploitation of sex is displayed publicly throughout media, so why can’t the education of it be displayed publicly as well. I believe that there is no other excuse as to why these teachings should be delayed. I know that most folks are socialized and shamed into even thinking that sex should be a behind doors conversation. But not being able to discuss it openly can lead to further problems. Not being able to discuss sex means not being able to discuss what sexual violence looks like. Therefore leaving an empty space for youth to think that things like sexual violence is and should be normalized. Which is not and forever should not be the case. Leaving that emptiness, that void of lingering questions and the wanting to explore, is neglectful in any youths development.
Is there a way that we can display healthy versions of sex education, that is culturally competent and treated just as important any other class. Yes, the answer is there are multiple ways that this can be displayed. So how can you?
Image by Mia Coleman